i'm overcome with awe lately by the women around me. not just the women, but my community. near and far. the inspiration is overwhelming.
i'm too excited to work. i just want to explore and learn from those around me.
this is not just procrastination.
i want to tend to the basics in life, like making sourdough and building fires. as etherial as it may seem i want to learn from the earth, from my kin. my chosen family is abundant and amazing.
i want to build relationships. i want to tend to the one i have with an amazing man who has so much to give. but we are struggling with the realities of life. with burdens from our past. with conflicts of the future.
none of it is easy.
i want to tend the fire.
i don't want to lay in bed with the blanket over my head. ignoring the shit around me. i have so much work to do right now and it looks like i'm going to be moving...again. this instability is getting to me. i want to remain in my little cabin. i don't want to move. i wish money was not an object.
my last quarter of school is herbs and homeopathy. so after this next session i can justifiably throw myself into the earth. learn the alchemy of the elements. i have my books and i have my teachers. many teachers. women that excite me. that make me want to jump up and down. to scream and shout. i don't care that they are far away. there knowledge is rich and deep and penetrating.
i want to surround myself with the knowledge gained by a thousand women. passed on from the ancestors, delivered to their descendants.
there is so much power and beauty out there to be known. i want to emerge myself in it all.