01/25/10
One of the most beautiful and peaceful births I’ve attended. I don’t know why. She was so beautiful as she sunk into the tub let the warm water relax her. Arms intertwined with her husband. As the surges came her voice rose to an operatic crescendo. I was waiting for her to break out in song. In a way she was.
We arrived at the house at 2am to find her in her bed. The poor soul was sick on top of being in labour. Listening to her hypnobirthing tapes she was in silent meditation. 6/7 cm, fully effaced, 0 station.
She rose from her bed and went to the tub. Within a few hours she was gently pushing her baby out as the little one rotated herself down and through her mothers pelvis. As she descended, K’s vagina slowly began to open, almost as if she were letting in the light to help guide her baby through the door, helping her to emerge into this bright world.
I sat silently in the corner. Watching. Listening. The sounds of her breathe. The moans rising in intensity as her baby was coming closer. She knew what to do. Though frightened briefly she strayed only once from the pain, until she embraced it and pushed her baby out in two surges.
Quietly the little baby came into being on her mother’s belly. Eyes open and alert, silently watching and taking in all that was around her. All those familiar voices were taking on new shapes. She felt safe and unafraid in her new environment. Still hanging on to her watery cocoon a single leg was immersed in the water.
She was placed on her father’s chest and wrapped to keep warm as her mother than birthed the home she had spent the last 40 weeks in. After mother was washed and tucked into bed, she was handed her new baby girl who latched on readily and ate until satiation.
The newborn exam done in the mother’s arms and then weighed and evaluated in front of the expanding family as they nourished themselves.
I am so blessed to be part of these experiences. One of the most intimate and important moments in a persons life, and I am privileged enough to share it with them.
Thank you.
Monday, January 25, 2010
Saturday, October 17, 2009
International Midwifery
October 17, 2009
Should start keeping track of the date.
So new horizons forced by unfortunate occurrences have brought me back to the UK and to Manchester. I quite sad to have left Shell and her (our) mommas, but I hope that when I return I'll be able to support them throughout their labour and birth. I always cry.
I've been seeking connections with midwives here, joined the forums and been in contact with some local women involved in maternity care. It has been a slow start, but I'm still adjusting to my new time zone which has been harder than usual to do. Last night was a wonderful break through. I was connected with a women from AIMS (Association for the Improvement of Maternity Services) by a local NHS midwife (independent at heart). Both are great contacts to make.
I suppose my position and interest here has changed or expanded a bit to research international maternity services. I'm being given this wonderful opportunity to experience first hand how midwifery is practiced in very different settings.
My first experience of course was in The Gambia. Quite a shocking one at that. Whether that was typical or not, I'm not sure, But I have a feeling that an on-call midwife is the way it goes. The hospital itself did not have a midwife on staff, but it seemed as though there was a repository from which they could draw. I believe most women gave birth in the local clinics at home, and if they were anything like the birth I witnessed, they included the use of induction (and in my opinion completely needlessly and purely to speed up labour rather than to get it going - but what do I know? It was by first birth and I was sent out of the room to get towels when the drugs were administered).
Then there were the hospital births at home which occurred without access to midwives. One a planned c-section the other a super-fast hypnobirthing mom, who laboured all by herself beautifully, showing up at the hospital fully dialated. Need to take a step back from those. The fact that there was no access to midwifery care in these instances is what is important.
My first real experience with midwives and to me initiation into the birthing "profession" was in Phoenix. While both in Regina and Phoenix there is a strong birthing and natural parenting community, there are significantly more midwives in Phoenix. Of course, we have the population difference. There are Certified Nurse Midwives (CNM) and Certified Professional Midwives (CPM) work somewhat laterally with each other. I can not say together, although a new partnership is in the works which will do wonders for bridging that gap and hopefully dissolving that hierarchy.
The CNM is the direction Canada is going and represent the majority of the NHS system here in the UK. This is where we must look to if we want to understand the pros and cons of community practices run by a group (ranging in size from 5-6 to more commonly 10-11 CNM's). Based on the forums I've been reading and the discussion I had last night, the concept of normal birth is being dissolved. Many midwives no longer facilitate unmedicated noninterventive births, due to volume and policy. This begs the question of malpractice insurance for midwives and how that changes their practice (a topic for another post).
Returning the community practices and the number of midwives that consequently are involved with a single woman's pregnancy continuity of care is sacrificed. This single factor alone is what sets a women up for a successful birth and what should define midwifery itself. If we've lost one-on-one care then are midwives any different than OB's? If you can not promise a women that you will be at her birth, how can she trust that she will be supported? A women should be able to chose her caregiver. This sentiment is lost. After the conversation last night, I discovered that although women do have the right to chose a midwife to care for her from within a community practice that right is not exercised, usually do to not being informed of that right.
What I have gotten out of my short time here so far is that the NHS model of midwifery is not one for the rest of the world to base themselves upon. They are fast moving away from evidence based care and traditional midwifery is being threatened.
My questions have expanded to include woman's thoughts on birth, their preferences and their experiences. Also included in this is the care providers perspectives, their beliefs, their practice and their restrictions.
I'm blessed with support on this path from new friends. Lets see where I am taken.
x
Should start keeping track of the date.
So new horizons forced by unfortunate occurrences have brought me back to the UK and to Manchester. I quite sad to have left Shell and her (our) mommas, but I hope that when I return I'll be able to support them throughout their labour and birth. I always cry.
I've been seeking connections with midwives here, joined the forums and been in contact with some local women involved in maternity care. It has been a slow start, but I'm still adjusting to my new time zone which has been harder than usual to do. Last night was a wonderful break through. I was connected with a women from AIMS (Association for the Improvement of Maternity Services) by a local NHS midwife (independent at heart). Both are great contacts to make.
I suppose my position and interest here has changed or expanded a bit to research international maternity services. I'm being given this wonderful opportunity to experience first hand how midwifery is practiced in very different settings.
My first experience of course was in The Gambia. Quite a shocking one at that. Whether that was typical or not, I'm not sure, But I have a feeling that an on-call midwife is the way it goes. The hospital itself did not have a midwife on staff, but it seemed as though there was a repository from which they could draw. I believe most women gave birth in the local clinics at home, and if they were anything like the birth I witnessed, they included the use of induction (and in my opinion completely needlessly and purely to speed up labour rather than to get it going - but what do I know? It was by first birth and I was sent out of the room to get towels when the drugs were administered).
Then there were the hospital births at home which occurred without access to midwives. One a planned c-section the other a super-fast hypnobirthing mom, who laboured all by herself beautifully, showing up at the hospital fully dialated. Need to take a step back from those. The fact that there was no access to midwifery care in these instances is what is important.
My first real experience with midwives and to me initiation into the birthing "profession" was in Phoenix. While both in Regina and Phoenix there is a strong birthing and natural parenting community, there are significantly more midwives in Phoenix. Of course, we have the population difference. There are Certified Nurse Midwives (CNM) and Certified Professional Midwives (CPM) work somewhat laterally with each other. I can not say together, although a new partnership is in the works which will do wonders for bridging that gap and hopefully dissolving that hierarchy.
The CNM is the direction Canada is going and represent the majority of the NHS system here in the UK. This is where we must look to if we want to understand the pros and cons of community practices run by a group (ranging in size from 5-6 to more commonly 10-11 CNM's). Based on the forums I've been reading and the discussion I had last night, the concept of normal birth is being dissolved. Many midwives no longer facilitate unmedicated noninterventive births, due to volume and policy. This begs the question of malpractice insurance for midwives and how that changes their practice (a topic for another post).
Returning the community practices and the number of midwives that consequently are involved with a single woman's pregnancy continuity of care is sacrificed. This single factor alone is what sets a women up for a successful birth and what should define midwifery itself. If we've lost one-on-one care then are midwives any different than OB's? If you can not promise a women that you will be at her birth, how can she trust that she will be supported? A women should be able to chose her caregiver. This sentiment is lost. After the conversation last night, I discovered that although women do have the right to chose a midwife to care for her from within a community practice that right is not exercised, usually do to not being informed of that right.
What I have gotten out of my short time here so far is that the NHS model of midwifery is not one for the rest of the world to base themselves upon. They are fast moving away from evidence based care and traditional midwifery is being threatened.
My questions have expanded to include woman's thoughts on birth, their preferences and their experiences. Also included in this is the care providers perspectives, their beliefs, their practice and their restrictions.
I'm blessed with support on this path from new friends. Lets see where I am taken.
x
Thursday, August 20, 2009
VISAS, SCHOOLS AND CIRCLES
So, I have been researching on how I am going to obtain a visa to continue to apprentice under Shell. Some days it looks positive, but as of late not so much. Not really sure where to go from here.
Midwifery isn't exactly at the top of the list when it comes to the government. They say they are hiring midwives, but they make it very difficult. Acknowledging that most of their midwives are educated outside of Canada, there seems to be no easy path to work with a preceptor for a prolonged period of time.
Schools. That is a joke, and not a funny one. UK schools, allegedly the highest standard, comes at a cost of $50,000 to $60,000 at the end of it being an International student. On the other side, I'm blatantly not ELIGIBLE to study at most schools, because their programs are NHS funded. Another hit to a socialized healthcare scheme? Only for us foreign students who are desperately trying to find their way.
Canadian schools not much help. Half the time I can't even reach them...either by email or phone. Understaffed? Typical across Canada. SO what's left?
Risk living illegally yet not on the shoulder of another country? i'm more than capable of supporting myself (along with the help of a very supportive community). Risk losing my national healthcare? Beginning my own fight to follow this path, which has now become such a passion. Not only because I want it for myself, but if I've ever needed a cause to advocate for, this is it.
Keep posted on my upcoming analysis on the state of Midwifery affairs in Canada.
Dire, but hopeful?
Midwifery isn't exactly at the top of the list when it comes to the government. They say they are hiring midwives, but they make it very difficult. Acknowledging that most of their midwives are educated outside of Canada, there seems to be no easy path to work with a preceptor for a prolonged period of time.
Schools. That is a joke, and not a funny one. UK schools, allegedly the highest standard, comes at a cost of $50,000 to $60,000 at the end of it being an International student. On the other side, I'm blatantly not ELIGIBLE to study at most schools, because their programs are NHS funded. Another hit to a socialized healthcare scheme? Only for us foreign students who are desperately trying to find their way.
Canadian schools not much help. Half the time I can't even reach them...either by email or phone. Understaffed? Typical across Canada. SO what's left?
Risk living illegally yet not on the shoulder of another country? i'm more than capable of supporting myself (along with the help of a very supportive community). Risk losing my national healthcare? Beginning my own fight to follow this path, which has now become such a passion. Not only because I want it for myself, but if I've ever needed a cause to advocate for, this is it.
Keep posted on my upcoming analysis on the state of Midwifery affairs in Canada.
Dire, but hopeful?
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
have you posted a new blog?
question was asked, this is written in response.
Ok so much has been accomplished in the last few months. I've FINALLY begun my books studies. something that i should have been doing for ages now. but was so discombobulated before that i needed a bit more guidance.
Of course there have been struggles particularly revolving around my personal life, but they seem to matter less now that i am finally DOING what I've been wanting to do for several years now. Who knows, had i not walked the path i had i may not be where i am...alternatively I could be much further along. that is an unnecessary question though.
I did my first vaginal exam yesterday. yes i just said vaginal. does that make you cringe? I felt a babies head bob on my fingers while still in utero. pretty damn cool if you ask me.
is this a calling? a passion? I don't know. there are definitely women i have met along the way that it is clearly obvious that THIS is what they are supposed to be doing. Alls I know is that this is the first time in years that i am not depressed. None of it grosses me out, though some of it scares the heck out of me and makes me nervous...but that is more a result of Shell throwing me into the deep end.
I wish i had more expereince..more knowledge. either through memorising of all the books i've read or through life experience that has imprinted all that knowledge into me. perhaps i'd feel more confident if i were initiated into the club?
that is all irrelevant when you can comfort a women in her time of need. i may not have all the answers, say all the right things, but I KNOW what comes naturally. you can't fake that, you can't LEARN that. you are BORN that way. all your life expereinces helps to create that empathy. it doesn't matter that i haven't pushed a baby out of my vagina (yes i said it again) or had a surgical birth. but i can sit there and be engaged while other mommas talk about all the issues that surround it. I can cry along with them when they speak of the loss they feel through unfortunate experiences.
does that make it a calling? or my passion? regardless of where this current life lesson takes me. it has been just that a lesson. one that solidifies within my being that this is what i want to do.
i am so grateful for this opportunity.
thank you Shell (and of course Michael who feeds us and brings us coffee)
Ok so much has been accomplished in the last few months. I've FINALLY begun my books studies. something that i should have been doing for ages now. but was so discombobulated before that i needed a bit more guidance.
Of course there have been struggles particularly revolving around my personal life, but they seem to matter less now that i am finally DOING what I've been wanting to do for several years now. Who knows, had i not walked the path i had i may not be where i am...alternatively I could be much further along. that is an unnecessary question though.
I did my first vaginal exam yesterday. yes i just said vaginal. does that make you cringe? I felt a babies head bob on my fingers while still in utero. pretty damn cool if you ask me.
is this a calling? a passion? I don't know. there are definitely women i have met along the way that it is clearly obvious that THIS is what they are supposed to be doing. Alls I know is that this is the first time in years that i am not depressed. None of it grosses me out, though some of it scares the heck out of me and makes me nervous...but that is more a result of Shell throwing me into the deep end.
I wish i had more expereince..more knowledge. either through memorising of all the books i've read or through life experience that has imprinted all that knowledge into me. perhaps i'd feel more confident if i were initiated into the club?
that is all irrelevant when you can comfort a women in her time of need. i may not have all the answers, say all the right things, but I KNOW what comes naturally. you can't fake that, you can't LEARN that. you are BORN that way. all your life expereinces helps to create that empathy. it doesn't matter that i haven't pushed a baby out of my vagina (yes i said it again) or had a surgical birth. but i can sit there and be engaged while other mommas talk about all the issues that surround it. I can cry along with them when they speak of the loss they feel through unfortunate experiences.
does that make it a calling? or my passion? regardless of where this current life lesson takes me. it has been just that a lesson. one that solidifies within my being that this is what i want to do.
i am so grateful for this opportunity.
thank you Shell (and of course Michael who feeds us and brings us coffee)
Wednesday, July 15, 2009
Relocating to the East Valley
I suppose it would be best if I read back in my post to see what I've said, so there are no gaps, but that's not my style. With the birth centre on hold because of the Monte Vista location I've had to move...this was not a bad thing despite the fortunate situation I was in. It's too bad the property won't work out, but with Shell's practice expanding the pace of things are picking up. I meet my second mother tomorrow. I look forward to helping these mom's and by the sounds of it this next one will probably be teaching me a lot as this is her third home birthed baby!!
I'm so excited and things are really starting to come together. My studies I feel are coming along. I'm definitely engaged in the material, but there is so much to know. so much to learn. and i'm excited about it all!!
so back to the title of this post. I've moved! it was touch and go for a bit, I had a lovely offer from my new friend Rafael, but this seemed be where I was meant to go. I feel a bit bad that Ralph and Marshall went through the effort of cleaning out the room for me. I do feel bad about that, but I'm now living with three lovely women, all socially and environmentally consious. We have ten chickens, solar panels on the roof for the water heater, composting, communal...its wonderful! down part is the new commute I have to make into Phoenix, but we're currently working out a transit/bike plan that may work.
Anyways, all is well in the state of denmark.
My focus attention right now is on our lovely Echo and hoping she goes into labour soon. I wish I could be there with her, but I know she is strong and powerful and it will be a beautiful birth.
I'm so excited and things are really starting to come together. My studies I feel are coming along. I'm definitely engaged in the material, but there is so much to know. so much to learn. and i'm excited about it all!!
so back to the title of this post. I've moved! it was touch and go for a bit, I had a lovely offer from my new friend Rafael, but this seemed be where I was meant to go. I feel a bit bad that Ralph and Marshall went through the effort of cleaning out the room for me. I do feel bad about that, but I'm now living with three lovely women, all socially and environmentally consious. We have ten chickens, solar panels on the roof for the water heater, composting, communal...its wonderful! down part is the new commute I have to make into Phoenix, but we're currently working out a transit/bike plan that may work.
Anyways, all is well in the state of denmark.
My focus attention right now is on our lovely Echo and hoping she goes into labour soon. I wish I could be there with her, but I know she is strong and powerful and it will be a beautiful birth.
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